Things You May Not Have Realized (Open Letter to Lawyers Everywhere)

23 Mar

1) My sole work existence is actually to work for you – to make your life easier.  It is what you hired me to do and what I’m damn good at, so don’t treat me like a pain in your ass when I have a suggestion or need to ask you a question.  It will backfire on you eventually.

2) The folks that work for you are human beings.  Ok, try to grasp this…I’ll type slowly…they have LIVES, they have responsibilities just like you…fiscally, physically and emotionally and they are trying to meet those responsibilities with 1/8th of the salary you make…so don’t go out of your way to be an asshole.  It’s hard enough as it is. 

3) Sadly for most staff, lawyers love to hear themselves talk, but never really do anything…about anything.   We all know it, so save your breath.  You are using up my oxygen.

4) I don’t like you nearly as much as when I took this job.  I’ve tried really, really hard….but you’ve taken countless opportunities to blow it. 

5) If you break any of the rules above…it will most certainly result in a sick day for me because it’s the only thing you’ve left me that I can use to invest in myself and my well-being.

On a positive note…I am very thankful to be employed in this current economy…but even conscientious humans have their limit.   We should be so happy we are here together as a team….but I seem to be the only one that thinks so!

Tomorrow – “To Hell with the Earth, We’ve Got a Law Firm to Run!”

2 Responses to “Things You May Not Have Realized (Open Letter to Lawyers Everywhere)”

  1. Cori March 23, 2010 at 12:10 pm #

    I will try not to comment every time, but this one is really great. Especially number 2. I think you need a “like” button! 🙂

  2. katie o. March 23, 2010 at 4:19 pm #

    “…save your breath, you’re using up my oxygen”. i’m totally stealing that.
    that’s brilliant.

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