My Life as a Daycare Worker

5 May

I’ve often thought maybe I should be a daycare worker, but if the truth be known, I don’t always have a lot of patience.  Something I have even less patience for?  Grown-ass men acting like babies.  Rephrase – grown-ass, wealthy men acting like babies.   Lately, I seem to spend a great deal of time caring for them.   My God, if only I could send them to a time-out or spank their butts, I’d feel a little better.  

How can grown men executives be so immature?  I guess it’s because no one has the nerve to stand up to them.  Granted, in many law firms you can’t just tell them what you think because it will result in your immediate dismissal.  Instead, you must force some type of sick smile and take it.  

How are Bad Bosses like little naughty babies?

1 – Regularly throw fits to get what they want.  When Bad Boss is yelling, it is all I can do not to picture him stamping his feet or falling down on the floor and kicking his little legs and screaming.

2 – They can’t clean up after themselves at all.   I’ve seen 2 years olds do a better job.

3 – No concept of sharing.   The only two words they seem to know without a doubt are “No!” and “Mine!”

4 – I have to repeat myself over and over and over, yet they still look at me like it is the first time they’ve heard a human word.   I must answer the same questions 25 times a month.

5 – At the end of the day, they’ve filled their diaper with more poo than you thought humanly possible.   It is almost laughable some days to see them strutting around the office with a full diaper.  It’s all I can do not to hold my nose.

Do you have babies in your office too?   Do you regularly feel that perhaps you should have sought that teaching certificate and do something that matters?   Do you keep diaper ointment in your desk and pacifiers?    I do.

Tomorrow – But She Makes More Than Me…..

6 Responses to “My Life as a Daycare Worker”

  1. office1 May 5, 2010 at 9:14 am #

    My lord…tell me they can at least burp themselves!

    • livingdilbert May 5, 2010 at 2:35 pm #

      Good point and I left it out – they can’t burp themselves!

  2. Amy May 5, 2010 at 10:00 am #

    I swear you work with me. #2 is soooo true! I blame their mommas.

  3. Leah May 5, 2010 at 12:15 pm #

    I know it’s a sad day when I have to use the same language with my 2-year-old that I do with my staff. Sadly, my toddler responds much better!

  4. Cori May 5, 2010 at 6:10 pm #

    When the children behave better than the adults it is scary. Too bad you can’t put Bad Bosses in a “time out”. Although, thinking about you trying this is making me laugh! 🙂

    You could also try the old school remedy- write on the blackboard 100 times: I will not be a Bad Boss anymore. The world does not really revolve around me, no matter how much I think it does.

  5. izziedarling May 5, 2010 at 8:13 pm #

    Thought for every day: at least you aren’t married to any of them! Woo Hoo!

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