While the Cat’s Away…

2 Aug

You know, the mouse will play!   It was so damn nice to come in this morning (at 10:30) and not be walking around on eggshells!   Oh, the relief!   It sure resounds the idea of a new job.   Anyway, in the meantime, I plan to enjoy my week without Bad Boss!   Here are some planned highlights:

1 – Come in late every day.   Leave early to make up for it.

2 – Take 1.5 – 2 hour lunches.  Get as many friends as I can to come and join me and the parking will be on Bad Boss’ dime!

3 – I may enjoy wine one day at lunch.

4 – Thanks to your great ideas, smear mayonnaise under Bad Boss’ desk on about Thursday.  Should be ripe by Monday.

5 – Listen to music all day long with my headphones and no one will be shouting to me from their offices and sing happily to myself.

6 – Sleep peacefully with no nightmares about Bad Boss…killing me or vice versa.

7 – Pry into our checkbooks to see how we are staying open and how much money the firm really has.  I know where he keeps the key.

8 – I may wear the same pants all week if I feel like it.

9 – Look for other jobs completely openly rather than somewhat stealthily like I usually do.


I have absolutely no remorse regarding such behavior.  I have more than earned it.   Hell, I’m just trying to stay alive at this point!

Next Time – The Absurdity of Bad Company Name Changes

14 Responses to “While the Cat’s Away…”

  1. Office1 August 2, 2010 at 3:22 pm #

    You absolutely have earned it. Enjoy every luxurious moment this week!

  2. bookjunkie August 2, 2010 at 3:22 pm #

    #7 sounds like fun spy work

  3. Brea August 2, 2010 at 3:25 pm #

    Loving the Mood Indicator today! *snicker* And just a hint, leave a “loogie”-sized blob of mayo when smearing, or it’ll just dry and flake. (Not that I’ve tried it, hones-well, maybe just in the name of hypothetical scientific research, you know)

    And make sure to check under the desk first, before smearing… there could already be memories of BB under there, from him picking his nose while he waits for business to walk in his door. Don’t want you catching the BB plague.

    *shudder* sorry…gross.

    • Pkitass August 2, 2010 at 4:15 pm #


    • livingdilbert August 2, 2010 at 5:12 pm #

      Worse mental image? Best Friend said he is probably terrible in the sack and then I got a mental picture….talk about GROSS!! 🙂

  4. Vodka and Ground Beef August 2, 2010 at 4:06 pm #

    I love this attitude. Come late, leave early . . . true bliss.

  5. Pkitass August 2, 2010 at 4:17 pm #

    Enjoy as much as possible while you can 🙂

    • livingdilbert August 2, 2010 at 5:10 pm #

      Oh, I will….and will post my adventures! Thank you!

  6. alchiketi August 2, 2010 at 4:19 pm #

    i hope all BBs in the universe are away from work. my bb was away today and it was like heaven!

    • livingdilbert August 2, 2010 at 5:11 pm #

      Wouldn’t that be wonderful for everyone?! If only there could be such a day where all the crappy bosses in the world had to call in sick? Joyous, on many levels.

  7. izziedarling August 2, 2010 at 5:59 pm #

    Woo Hoo, LD – have a GREAT week!

  8. chlost August 2, 2010 at 9:23 pm #

    Not to rain on the parade, but is there an office snitch who will be keeping track of what everyone is doing while BB is out? There is usually one in every office. Perhaps someone can ask that person to check underneath the desk and then the germs can make that person sick….and you will have the place to yourself!

  9. thoughtsappear August 3, 2010 at 8:47 am #

    Excellent list! If you come in late, take long lunches, and leave early, I think that leaves you about 15 minutes each day to do the other activities on your list.

    Enjoy your week “off!”

  10. blada August 5, 2010 at 10:47 pm #

    OMG! We just discovered your blog and have fallen off the couch laughing. We need a LifeCall pendant to get back up!
    Sorry your week of freedom is almost over. 😦

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